Dear Miss Manners: When is one obliged to join a standing ovation? My understanding is that standing ovations are reserved for truly outstanding performances, and that applause while seated will suffice as a show of appreciation for other performances. However, if one’s fellow audience members judge a performance worthy of a standing ovation and rise, is one required to join them? Is it rude to remain seated?
Dear Miss Manners: My high school did not, as I recall, limit its senior prom to couples, and when I’ve heard of schools that do, I’ve always assumed that it was because of mistaken notions of what is traditional at formal dances.
Dear Miss Manners: I am fortunate enough to be expecting in a few months, and I have a very sweet and generous mother-in-law who would like to throw me a baby shower. (My mother would like to as well, but her finances are tight, so it wouldn’t be so bad if she let my MIL take the reins. My mother just threw me a bridal shower two years ago.)
Dear Miss Manners: I have created a gentle and cordial debate about the use of top sheets: When patterned sheets are used, does the print go face up or down? Since it usually gets covered by a blanket or bedspread, it is not seen. If it gets folded back in front of the pillows, it is usually the hem that shows, and most of the time the sheet and blanket are covered by the pillows and then the spread.
Dear Miss Manners: Are you obligated to have a graduation party for your child in order for your child to receive gifts? When I graduated high school in 1981, some of my friends had parties, but most did not. All of us still received gifts (usually monetary) from family and friends.
Dear Miss Manners: I have been reading about calling-card protocol in a few dusty old etiquette books and something puzzled me. Several authors writing in different time periods indicated that simpler is better when it came to the style of the calling card; they described using simple text, with the person’s name and perhaps an address, being careful to avoid ostentation.
Dear Miss Manners: It has been brought to my attention that if you are to go to someone else’s prom, you should wear a less attractive/fancy dress. This is because you would not want to outshine the graduates.
Dear Miss Manners: I was invited to a shower by a group of the groom’s mother’s lady friends. Apparently it was close to the “small” wedding (three weeks) and the bride and groom could not be home for the shower, as they both work in a city about five hours away.
Dear Miss Manners: I am a 20-year-old college student. My grandmother sends me dozens of forwarded emails each week with information such as “watch out for new virus.”
Dear Miss Manners: I am seeking a polite, civil, yet firm way to express that a person’s opinions and thoughts are unwarranted and unwelcome.
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