Heavy metal seniors . . .

It had to be a very unpleasant day in federal court on Monday for Amherst scam artist Richard S. Piccoli, who found out that, at the ripe old age of 82, he is looking at a potential prison term of nearly 20 years.

About 150 of his victims—most of them very angry senior citizens— crowded into a courtroom to observe, and they had no kind words for the man who took their money.

When Piccoli said he had a “BS degree in history,” one spectator muttered, “Yeah, BS is right.”

Extra federal marshals were on duty to make sure no violence erupted, and none did.

Court officials said quite a few of the spectators set off the metal detectors when they entered the courthouse, but it wasn’t because they were carrying weapons.

The detectors were set off by the metal in replacement knees and limbs among some of the crowd.

When animals attack . . .

Marijuana is sometimes referred to, accurately or not, as a “gateway” drug. Judging by a recent item in the Alden Advertiser, unleashed dogs running free may be the “gateway” crime.

A German shepherd recently running loose and scaring kids on one street in Alden opened the door to a succession of law-breaking.

As noted in the Advertiser, one man —who shall remain nameless, to spare him embarrassment—“decided to drive his truck recklessly down the street to confront the dog and [its] owner and slid off the road, almost striking people walking off of the street.”

The chain of crime did not end there:

“Another [man] decided to alarm all the neighbors who had gathered outside by storming outside with a bow and arrow, causing all to run away.”

The driver was charged with reckless endangerment. The local Robin Hood got a court appearance ticket. The dog that started it all was rounded up by animal control.

The moral of the story: Keep your dog on a leash. You never know what crimes you might be preventing.

Time to let it go . . .

Whatever happened to hope and change?

A local woman was the victim of some very belated post-election rage.

She reported to Buffalo police last weekend that someone badly scratched her Hyundai Elantra overnight on June 5 while it was parked in a residential section of Allentown.

The car, which was at Hudson Street and Orton Place, sustained more than $1,500 in damage, according to the owner.

The victim told police she believes she knows who vandalized her car and said that it was because the alleged scratcher doesn’t like her “John McCain” bumper sticker on her car.

Good thing she didn’t have a Sarah Palin sticker, too.

Can Tina Fey play her? . . .

Erie County Clerk Kathy Hochul expects to be the point person locally for people who want answers about the new enhanced driver’s licenses that are among the documents that make it easier for state residents to cross the border after visiting Canada.

But she wondered this week why she was getting calls about it from friends and former Buffalonians around the nation?

The answer could be found on CNN Headline News, which was rerunning clips of an interview she had given to WKBW-TV(Channel 7).

That was a lot of national exposure for Hochul, which led a reporter to note that when she ran for clerk in 2007, she garnered nearly 144,000 votes.

The year before, another not-very-well- known female political figure got more than 114,000 votes in her election —for Alaska governor –and look what that did for Sarah Palin.

Hochul, though, insists that her moment of national celebrity will not translate into a run for what she called “much higher office.”