ADVERTISEMENT

Dear Abby: I met a guy I think is perfect for me on a dating website. We have gone on several dates and they have been great. He respects my morals and even has some of his own, which isn’t easy to find.

The problem: He says I am exactly what he has been looking for except for one thing. I look like his mother. He says he really likes me and would like to keep dating to see if he can get past this issue. I like him very much. Is there something I can do, short of plastic surgery?

– Dead Ringer in Arizona

Dear Dead Ringer: Before changing anything, you need to explore more closely what he’s saying. Ask to meet his mother, then judge for yourself how strong the resemblance is. It’s possible the similarity is less physical and more about your personality or mannerisms.

You should not alter your image to please anyone but yourself. Keep in mind that many men DO marry women who resemble their mothers in some way – whether it’s conscious or not – and the marriages are often successful.

‘Adventure’ time

Dear Abby: I’m a 32-year-old woman. My boyfriend of 11 years passed away almost three years ago. I loved him very much and miss him every day. Some well-meaning friends and family members have suggested a dating site.

Abby, when does someone know if it’s time to move on? I haven’t been on a date in 13 years. I’m scared of putting myself out there again and getting hurt. Any advice would be great.

– Scared in Oregon

Dear Scared: If the only reason you haven’t reached out before is fear of rejection, then it’s time to move on. Ask your friends and family to help you write a profile, and then consider what happens next as an “adventure.”

While there are no guarantees you’ll immediately find a relationship like the one you had, you might find someone who is compatible. And if you don’t, you could still make some friends. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.