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Sunday, November 22, 2009

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Thomas M. Hajduk is sorely missed.

DWI victim’s family issues sobering plea

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Anyone thinking of downing a few drinks before driving home from today’s final Bills game should consider the heartache of Thomas M. Hajduk’s family.

Hajduk, 51, of Lancaster, was killed late on the afternoon of Nov. 2, when he was struck and killed on Aurora Street in Lancaster while walking to a friend’s house for dinner.

Lancaster police later filed a DWI charge against the driver, Michael J. O’Connor, 22, of Amherst, who had just dropped off some friends while returning home after the Bills game.

Hajduk’s brother and sister and his parents are devastated. So are the 750 people who filed into the wake for the engineer, musician, bird lover, wildlife enthusiast and avid Bills and Sabres fan.

Hajduk’s relatives were willing to talk about their loss Friday, to help explain the pain that drunken driving can create for any victim’s family.

“He [the driver] took away a person who meant so much to so many,” said Robin Bacon, Hajduk’s sister. “I don’t want [Tom] to be faceless and forgotten.”

A graduate of Hutchinson- Central Technical High School, Hajduk earned his bachelor’s degree in electrical engineering from the University at Buffalo. The last 10 years of his life, “Duke” Hajduk worked for Moog Inc., specializing in calibrating instruments in the heating-treating process.

Hajduk was known for a lot more than his technical expertise.

He was an accomplished musician, who sang, played the guitar and wrote music best described as a folk-rock combination. He played and sang at family gatherings, open-mike events, weddings, parties and on benefit albums.

He was an enthusiastic birder, who set up numerous bird feeders in his backyard and took great photos of birds, once capturing a shot of four bluebirds on his railing. He also was a wildlife enthusiast, who devoted time and energy to the Hawk Creek Wildlife Center.

And Hajduk was known as a people person, a great listener, a philosopher who loved talking about current events, a man who loved to remember people’s birthdays and took special efforts with his friends’ children. As an example, he once wrote a letter to a good friend’s child, about the trials of being a middle child.

“I look back thinking, if I can take anything from this horrible tragedy, it would be to be more like my brother,” Bacon said. “I get strength thinking how unselfish and giving he was.”

Hajduk was killed at about 5:30 p. m. Nov. 2, while walking to the friend’s house; because it was less than a mile away, he decided to walk, rather than get in his car, with his hurting back.

Family members realize the awful coincidence of Hajduk, an avid Bills fan, being struck and killed by a vehicle returning home from a Bills game.

“If you want to go to the Bills game and have a good time, that’s great,” Bacon said. “But be responsible. Have a designated driver, or take a bus or taxi.”

Hajduk is survived by his parents, Marcella Grzedzicki and Edward Hajduk; his brother, Mark; his sister, Robin Bacon; and plenty of cousins, nephews and nieces.

His family wants others to realize the toll taken on any family by drunken driving.

“People killed in this manner, by a drunken driver, they’re someone’s brother or sister or child or parent,” said Hajduk’s brother-in-law, Joseph Bacon. “They’re not just a name in the newspaper. Their lives mean so much to somebody.”

And a drunken-driving death isn’t mourned quite the same as someone dying from natural causes.

Besides dealing with the loss of Hajduk, his family has other issues. There’s anger about how he died. There’s also the whole legal issue hanging over the charges lodged against the driver.

As Robin Bacon said, “There are so many things that stunt the healing process.”

gwarner@buffnews.com


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