Tonawanda High School, like most schools, had a problem.

Two groups of girls, five or six all together, engaged in name-calling, threatening phone

calls and making nasty Facebook entries. Then one day, one of the girls who was being taunted

shoved another girl.

School officials suspended the girl who did the shoving, talked with all the girls and then

tried to set up a mediation session, although one girl's family balked.

"You get the kids and their families together, you try to talk it out, and you get to the

root of the problem," City of Tonawanda youth services Detective Timothy Toth said. "If we

can't get kids and families to the table, then the process breaks down."

The situation in Tonawanda, probably replicated dozens of times in local schools, shows both

the resolve of school officials and the challenges they face, as they work with police and

youth bureaus to try to stem school bullying.

Related: Massachusetts school head defends response to bullying

Bullying, in its severest forms, can lead to the type of tragedy that occurred in western

Massachusetts in January when a 15-year-old girl hanged herself after being harassed

mercilessly by fellow students, authorities say.

No similar case has been reported here, but experts say bullying occurs in virtually every

school district.

The 4,557 schools in New York State reported 24,404 incidents of intimidation, harassment

or bullying not involving physical contact or a weapon in the 2007-08 school year, according

to the most recent data from the state Education Department.

That's an average of five incidents per school.

Most schools have deployed more school resource officers, psychologists and social workers

in the battle against bullying. Mediation — bringing students and families together to

hash out the underlying problems — has become one of their main weapons.

"Mediation is probably the best tool in our tool box," Tonawanda High School Principal

Kevin E. Kazmierczak said.

Bullying is a natural instinct among children.

"This is all part of Darwinian natural selection, survival of the fittest," said Jean M.

Alberti, a Chicago-area clinical psychologist. "The strong pick on the weak. They pick on the

ones who are different.

"It would be naive to think that it's not prevalent in every school," she added.

Bullying, even if it doesn't escalate into violence, takes its toll in every school.

"It certainly is something we have to address, because it takes the student's focus 180

degrees from where we want it to be," Kazmierczak said. "It takes it away from studying and

learning."

Just because bullying is a natural instinct doesn't mean it should be tolerated, Alberti

said. Kids are toilet-trained at a young age. They're naturally selfish, but they're taught to

be kind and compassionate.

Alberti, who earned her doctorate at the University at Buffalo and whose name will grace

UB's new Jean M. Alberti Center for the Prevention of Bullying, Abuse and School Violence,

thinks people need to look at bullying for what it really is.

"Bullying is child abuse by children," she said.

"All of this stems from educators not getting involved," she added. "I am appalled that

educators are keeping hands-off in so many of these situations."

If bullying is such a natural instinct, how can it be prevented?

"We need to change this belief that "This is kids being kids, and they have to learn to

deal with it,' " Alberti said. "I think the climate of the schools needs to be changed, to

encourage children to accept differences and to reduce the pressures to conform."

School bullying is such a hot topic that organizers of an all-day symposium on the issue at

UB's North Campus on April 27 cut off registrations at 400 long before the event.

Bullying isn't confined to any one age group.

In January, some kids in a Lackawanna elementary school class were picking on a 9-year-old

girl, someone who seemed a little different, not one of the "cooler" kids.

They said nasty things about her family.

"I'm gonna get you," one girl said.

And one student tapped her on the head.

School officials called Lackawanna police, who brought in the three girls — the

victim and two taunters — along with their parents. The school principal even joined in

the mediation session.

"You're too young to be doing this," Lackawanna Police Detective Tia (cq)Celestino told the

girls. who heads the Juvenile Unit, said of the January incident. "One thing I always say is

"How would you feel if this were you, if you were the kid being picked on?' "

If left unchecked, bulling can lead to violence, some experts believe.

"If we address bullying, a less severe form of violence, we are actively working to prevent

potential escalation into the violence that was seen in the school shootings that occurred in

the late 1990s and early this decade," said Catherine Cook-Cottone, a University at Buffalo

associate professor in school psychology.

Bullies, who may pick on others because they themselves feel alienated, may feel further

alienated from the school if they're punished — and not provided some needed counseling.

And it's not just the bullies who could turn violent. So could their victims, if they feel

alienated enough.

"They want to become the bullies that once terrorized them," Cook-Cottone said.

Experts in the field cited some of the measures schools are taking to reduce the bullying:

Setting up drop boxes for students to report anonymous tips about bullying.

Creating "character education" courses or programs, dealing with values and issues

like bullying.

Bringing in speakers, such as survivors of the Columbine school massacre, to raise

students' consciousness.

Spelling out the disciplinary procedures for those caught bullying, so students

learn the consequences.

Creating a strong referral system, to make sure that those who are disciplined also

are referred to school counselors, social workers or psychologists, so they don't feel further

alienated.

Setting up student-intervention teams, freshman transition teams,

conflict-resolution specialists and peer-to-peer partnering programs.

In 2007-08, Erie County schools reported 1,308 bullying incidents, while Niagara County

schools reported 511, according to the state data.

The three schools in Erie and Niagara counties reporting the largest number of incidents

were Niagara Falls High School with 83, North Tonawanda High School with 75 and Benjamin

Franklin Middle School in the Town of Tonawanda with 57.

Officials from those districts say the numbers need to be put in context, that they're two

years old. The data shows that the schools diligently report every incident that occurs in the

schools, the officials added.

They also said their schools have put in place programs to combat bullying in response to

these incidents, and at least one school cited a sharp reduction in incidents since then.

Niagara Falls School Superintendent Cynthia Bianco noted that the high school, with 2,300

students, is one of the largest in the area.

"We certainly have taken great fidelity in reporting everything," said Mark Laurrie, the

deputy superintendent and former high school principal. "We used that information to develop

programs and create the environment to help students."

Bianco said she couldn't promise that something like the bullying Phoebe Prince experienced

in western Massachusetts wouldn't happen in Niagara Falls.

"What I can guarantee is that it wouldn't go unaddressed," she said.

Donald Ogilvie, the Erie 1 BOCES superintendent, said he's not aware of any severe cases of

bullying at schools in his area.

"We haven't had extreme cases that have captured public attention, but I think there is a

level of concern and vigilance on the part of school officials," Ogilvie said. "Our schools

are replete with policies and regulations and codes of conduct."

The Buffalo Public Schools have a comprehensive anti-bullying program in place, and the

district makes sure that students and staffers are aware of its provisions, said Will

Keresztes, associate superintendent for educational services.

Bullying is prohibited in the district's code of conduct, which is being translated into

the five languages most commonly spoken by the burgeoning refugee student population —

Spanish, Somalian, Burmese, Karen (from Burma) and Arabic.

"Bullying is, sadly, a function of how people treat each other," Keresztes said. "Not just

children, but adults too. The question is how does the district address it."