Dear Abby: My boyfriend and I have been together a year and a half. I regret moving in with him when I did, which was after only three months of dating.
We have been through a lot, including my struggle with various health issues. Throughout this he has become an insensitive person who treats me like garbage. There has been a lot of emotional abuse, and it has taken me quite a while to be able to see it.
The other night I was about to break up with him. Then he suddenly changed his tune. He said: “I’m listening. You’re right. I need to change. I love you.” Abby, at this point I really don’t care, but I gave him another chance.
Was I wrong to do that? He has changed for now – quite drastically – but I know he could easily go back. I no longer love him. I also no longer find him attractive, and I actually think he’s immensely annoying. He’s trying to get me to fall back in love with him, but I really don’t want to. Do I stay or do I go?
– Wavering in Canada
Dear Wavering: Reread the last paragraph of your letter, and you will see in your own words why it’s time for you to go. He may be trying, but frankly, it is too late. Pack your bags. There’s nothing deader than a dead romance.
‘Emergency kit’ for elderly
Dear Abby: A friend recently shared some great advice. Her mom is 86 and in poor health, so my friend put together an emergency information briefcase for the trunk of her car and another one by the front door. If anyone needs to take her mother to the ER, all her important information is in two places. This includes medications, doctors, insurance cards, living will, power of attorney and family emergency numbers.
I took my friend’s advice, and it turned out to be a godsend when I had to take my 79-year-old mother to the ER after a serious fall. The admitting clerks said they wished everyone would do this. (I also included $100 in cash in a small envelope.) I hope you think her idea is worth sharing.
– Glad I Did in Alabama
Dear Glad: If the admitting clerks said they wished everyone would do this, then it’s worth a mention in my column. Readers, advance planning such as this could save precious minutes in an emergency.
Does ticket gifter get a cut?
Dear Abby: Please settle a family disagreement. A scratch ticket is given to a friend or relative as a gift. If that ticket is a winner, is there an expectation that the winnings should be shared with the person who gave the ticket?
– Jeff in Massachusetts
Dear Jeff: A gift is a gift. There is no obligation to share. Alexander Pope wrote, “Hope springs eternal in the human breast,” but if you are hoping you’ll get a cut, don’t hold your breath.