Dear Abby: I met a man 15 years ago who has recently come back into my life. He says he wants to marry me, and I very much would like to be his wife. I live in one state, he lives in another and his work is in yet another state.
The problem is I think he’s married to his job. He says he wants to be home with me once we are married. But then he says that once his work slows down, he won’t earn as much.
I’m not sure how I can do this, with him working in one state and living in another. Sometimes I wonder if he’s really in love with me or if he’s stringing me along. How can I be with him if I never see him?
– Hearts Awaiting
Dear Hearts Awaiting: If a “little voice” is telling you this man may be stringing you along, make no hasty decisions. It’s important that you visit him at his home at least a few times, get to know his friends and family, if he has any, and see how you would fit in.
You also need to decide how you would spend your “alone” time while he’s working. If you are an independent type, you’ll be able to fill the time. But if you’re not, you’d be miserable. So look before you leap to the altar.
People think he’s gay
Dear Abby: I am an educated, open-minded, well-spoken, well-mannered single man.
My problem is that people – especially women – think I’m gay. This issue has prohibited me from dating because ladies see me as a peer instead of potential partner. Please don’t think I am anti-gay. I have several gay friends. I don’t think my speech inflections or mannerisms make people assume this. I don’t know what to do. Help!
– Straight, But Not Narrow In Alabama
Dear Straight: Because there appears to be some confusion about your sexual orientation, I recommend you talk frankly with some of your female and male friends and ask what it is about you that has created this impression. Obviously there is something about the way you present yourself that’s causing it, and the quickest way to find out what it is would be to ask the people who know you best.