Dear Abby: There is a man at work I’m very attracted to. He seems to be equally attracted to me. The problem is, he has shown me two pictures of his privates that he has on his cellphone. When he did it, it wasn’t completely out of context of our conversation and our interest in each other. We do not have a physical relationship (yet), but I’m considering it. How weird is it that he has these pictures on his phone?
– Got An Eyeful in Illinois
Dear Got An Eyeful: That must have been some conversation! It’s amazing either of you get any work done with so many pheromones floating in the air. From my perspective, what your co-worker did was “premature” considering you have no social relationship (yet). It could also be considered a form of flashing.
However, while I consider what he did to be overexposure and not a particularly impressive courtship technique, displaying pictures of his anatomy on his cellphone is not unheard of among men who think like adolescents.
Customer not always right
Dear Abby: I’m a waitress at a 24-hour restaurant in a small town. Most of my customers are regulars, and for the most part we talk about current events and what is going on in each other’s lives. Last night, two of my regulars came in and one tried to grab my hand after the other put his hand up the sleeve of my shirt. Both repeatedly asked me incredibly personal questions about my love life and finances, and I’ll admit, I froze and then I walked away.
In any other kind of work environment what happened would be considered sexual harassment, but I’m not sure what to do about it, since they’re customers and I’m the employee. At what point is the customer really wrong?
– May I Take Your Order?
Dear May: The point at which the customer is really wrong is when he (or she) repeatedly asks personal questions about a server’s love life and puts his (or her) hands on the server. The way to handle it is to report what happened to your supervisor or employer, and make certain that in the future you are not the person taking their order. What happened was inappropriate, period.
Threesome’s a crowd
Dear Abby: We have a cabin on a lake in New England. It is next door to some of our relatives. We’ve made friends with neighbors on the other side and would like to invite them over for dinner. Our relatives are also friendly with the neighbors. If we invite them for dinner, must we invite the relatives too?
– Judy On “Golden Pond”
Dear Judy: Technically, you don’t have to. However, if you have mostly socialized as a “threesome,” feelings may be hurt if you suddenly change what has become customary.