Dear Abby: I'm a single guy, 33 years old. I am 6 feet 9 inches tall and defined as husky. I only need to enter a room, and it gets quiet followed by a "funny" comment about my size. I smile and laugh to put people at ease. Then I'm forgotten, a gentle giant who is called on only when people want something.
I'm sorry to say women either want nothing to do with me or want something to do with my wallet. I don't enjoy spending my life alone, looked at like a freak of nature. But morning comes, and I carry on in pain while wearing a smile.
I keep hoping to find that special someone who would hold me and tell me it is going to be OK. It would be nice to smile because I'm happy instead of doing it to hide pain. Do you think it will happen someday? Maybe?
- Hurts to Smile
Dear Hurts: Yes, I do, and I'd like to suggest two things you can do to make it happen. The first is to contact a group called Tall Clubs International. It's a not-for-profit social organization for tall adults (men must be at least 6 feet 2 inches and women at least 5 feet 10 inches) that was founded in the late 1930s. It provides members with social activities and travel to cities around the U.S. and Canada for gatherings. The toll-free phone number is (888) 468-2552, and the website is www.tall.org. Through this group you can meet people with whom you see eye to eye.
I would also suggest that you talk about your self-esteem issues and sadness with a licensed mental health professional. You are not a freak; you're a big guy with a big heart and the same need to feel accepted and wanted as everyone else.
P.S. If you repeatedly encounter women who are only after your wallet, then you're hanging around with the wrong crowd.
Dear Abby: After 29 years of marriage, I am leaving. I took off my wedding ring about three weeks ago, and the indentation it left is like a permanent scar - a painful reminder of a failed marriage. Do you have any suggestions to lessen the mark left on my finger? I have considered buying myself a large precious gemstone in celebration of my freedom, but I would like to know if there are any alternatives. I'm not opposed to plastic surgery if it is necessary.
- Marked for Life in Massachusetts
Dear Marred: If you buy yourself a large ring for the third finger of your left hand, people may think you are engaged or still married. My advice is to consult a dermatologist about the mark left by your wedding ring. It's possible that some of the injectable "fillers" that are used to lessen facial lines could also work for your finger. (I'll bet it won't be the first time the doctor has been asked this question.)